RObsten Breaks Up according to b.s. magazine OK!

It is so funny how these people continue to sell magazines!!

Hold on to something, Robsten fans! It’s Wednesday, which means OK! magazine has another “Twilight Exclusive” – and this one’s a gem.



As reported widely, this past Saturday “Eclipse” cast and crew held a rollicking wrap party at the Vancouver Aquarium. The tabloid claims a “brooding” Robert Pattinson arrived alone and left after only 45 minutes, wearing shades and a baseball cap. Why was Rob sad? Well, “sources” tell OK! Kristen Stewart “has shockingly pulled the plug on their romance.”



Yup. OK! has the “exclusive.” Let’s run down some of the key problems the tab cites.



According to a “friend of the couple,” Rob “was talking marriage,” while the still-teenaged Kristen “has a lot more living to do.”



Stewart also supposedly felt as though she was giving Rob too much of her time at the expense of friends and family, with the “pal” saying, “Kristen realized she was giving Rob all her attention to the exclusion of everyone else.”



Then there’s rehashed Taylor Talk. Dredging up months-old rumors that were wrong then and wrong now, OK! somewhat creepily uses “the buff physique of 17-year-old co-star Taylor Lautner” to invent a rivalry between Lautner and Pattinson for Stewart’s affections. On a night she supposedly went out with some girlfriends (sans Pattinson), Stewart “was saying Taylor keeps getting bigger and bigger and bigger… She shot some physically intimate stuff with him earlier that day and she couldn’t help noticing his bod. His hot bod.” Yeah, the same hot bod that OK! claims in an item four pages earlier is half of a “heating up” romance with Taylor Swift.



Then there’s the problem of geography. With two months to go “before work starts” on “Breaking Dawn” (um, wrong), Stewart and Pattinson also had supposed “tension” over whether to return to Los Angeles (Stewart’s choice) or London (Rob’s).



Plus, Stewart is “jealous” of the attention Pattinson receives from female fans – a jealousy that has supposedly “ignited some dramas” at the pair’s hotel and during a night out at a Vancouver bar.



And now here comes the best part.



After rattling off this series of, ahem, dubious reasons for the Pattinson and Stewart “split,” OK! turns in an escape worthy of Houdini.



“However, don’t drive a stake into their hearts just yet.”



Wait, what?



“Rob and Kristen would experience terrible withdrawal if they went their separate ways,” the rag’s source “predicts.”



Um… did Gossip Cop miss something?



The cover shows a torn photo of Pattinson and Stewart with “SPLIT!” plastered across it. The story’s headline says the same thing. The sub-head claims, “Kristen calls it quits.” The article itself throws theory after theory at the wall to make the claim stick.



But there… buried twenty-two paragraphs into the story, a “friend” says Stewart “just wants to hit the pause button.” Oh, and don’t be surprised, the tab says, when during promotion for “New Moon” and filming for “Breaking Dawn” “the chemistry will likely fire up again.”



Excuse Gossip Cop while we stand and applaud.



Well done, OK!



So a possible relationship into which the mag had zero insight, and which it breathlessly claims just ended in supposed “heartbreak,” might possibly be reversed almost immediately? Perhaps even by next week’s cover?



Brilliant!



By the way, Gossip Cop contacted Stewart’s representative, who laughed and asked of OK!, “Do you really consider them a news source?”



Enough said.

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